Five Regrets of the Dying - By Bronnie Ware

Five Regrets of the Dying - By Bronnie Ware

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone�s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, such as denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance.

Every single patient found their peace before they departed though... every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1) I wish I did had the courage to live a life true to myself, not
the life other expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2) I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children�s youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3) I wish I did had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4) I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.

Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5) I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called �comfort� of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your death-bed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying. Life is a choice.

It is YOUR life.
Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly.
Choose happiness.

After a long time I strongly feel about something and I can’t stop myself to write about it. As an Indian most of the time we all discuss in public and debate with our family and friends but when it comes to take any action we will simply say “Yaar chalta hai”, it’s not just you, I am also a part of this corrupt system, in past so many times it’s happened that I had two choices either I should pay bribe or ready to accept the delays in my work but as a common man I preferred the first one and paid the bribe like others.

I still remember say around 25 year back, the corruption was there but still if people talk about those corrupt people they refer the person with hate and disrespect. But after 25 years things are changed so many times when I visited India in last few years, I had found that people say with a different kind of feeling if you are doing your job with honesty people treat you like a fool, and the other person like a smart boy….”he knows how to earn money”, it means the problem is not started just know it’s having a deep roots back to our independence. The only thing which was changed is that before people were having worry if people will come to know than what they feel but now it is open game no one cares about these things for them it is all about money...total materialism. It Mean our Old generations did not give the right SANSKARS (teachings) to their children they were also interested in all those things but they forget one thing It will bite back, therefore you will find now a days, corruptions at all level not just limited to Money but in our homes also parents are crying that their children are not ready to take care of them, they just interested in their own life, self centered, etc. but did anyone think over it ,that why it happened.
Now come to the burning Topic a guy from a small village from Maharashtra, who was a truck driver in Indian army, a follower of Mahatma Gandhi who in past successfully did movements for so many social causes finally decide to take a final war against corruption who is 73 year old diabetic patient why he is so much interested for that, he is a bachelor living in a Temple using his pension for charitable causes no hidden agenda, this is all for the future of this nation, for the younger generation.

Few days back we all Indian were united talking about World cup, if I am not mistaken all over India irrespective of religion and caste everyone prayed for the Indian team, and after the win we all celebrated that with full hear ( I was one of them), even state governments showered crores of rupees on them, but did anybody thought does this money belongs to these politicians, it is a hard earned money of common people paid as a tax to the government and how these politician can shower these money on these players, if they played for national pride than they should not accept that or if they played for just money that no problem they have a right. But if they really believe in Nationalism or nation pride than don’t you think anyone of them at least come out in open and say against the corruption as they all are worried if they utter any word than ICCI and BCCI kick them out, their career will finish, I have seen a person on TV MBA and was working for an MNC but have a courage to resign and join the movement, and what these celebrities are doing nothing in that case our young actors are better at least they shows their supports, even one of the industrialist told that we all business people should support the movement. This is the high time we Indian should do something for the corruption, it is like a DEMAK (white ants) to our system, this is a war of do or die, now or never, I strongly feel that we all should at least support this movement, We don’t need IPL, we need these kind of movement to safeguard our future generation and India.

We should think over it if we can unite for a cricket match don’t you think this is the time we should unite for Indian and our younger generation future……………….THINK AGAIN
****************MERA BHARAT MAHAN*****************************